Sara Resumes Watching Leah, and Callie Loves It

I now eat some of what I said in yesterday's post. While Callie ate breakfast, Anna sat beside her and got her to laugh quite a bit.

Leah was back today, the first time in over a month. And Leah and Callie (2 days apart in age) had a great time with each other. Sara said the day could not have gone any better than what it did.

As she was putting them down for naps, she had them both in her arms, and they were hugging each other. Callie wakes up hard. By that I mean she cries. She started to do so when she woke from her nap . . . until she saw Leah. Then the world was a much happier place.

In other news, Callie slept through the night last night--only her second time since we've had her. Good for Sara! (Nonetheless, Sara went to bed earlier than normal tonight.)

Of course, the cutest pictures between Callie and Leah occurred today when we didn't have the camera in hand, but we still got a couple of them together, one of which is posted.

Callie's Relationship with Her Brother & Sisters

Andrew and Caty are very good at getting Callie to smile and laugh, and they enjoy playing little games with her they know she likes.

I don't know how to characterize the relationship between Callie and Anna. Anna doesn't get Callie to laugh as much, but she doesn't try like the other two.

Anna loves Callie, but I think she's struggling a little bit with her own place in the family now. She's been a bit of a stinker lately, and she and Sara had a heart-to-heart the other day (which is somewhat rare to get Anna involved in).

I've been concerned about this possibility in particular and have tried to give Anna lots of attention, but she may struggle with all the energy and time Callie is requiring of Sara.

Callie Loves Eating, Playing; Hates Medicine

Callie developed a fever yesterday afternoon, but no other symptoms. This morning she was fine.

We found out that one thing hasn't changed--she still hates to take medicine, and it still requires two of us to medicate her.

A funny characteristic: When she doesn't want something, she often says "byow byow" (no no), shakes her head, and shakes her hand back and forth. Sara and I remember Sara's Grandma Goldsmith shaking her hand, too, when she meant no.

Callie has at least two loves: eating and playing outside. She sometimes gets very frustrated when she doesn't get to do one or the other.

Sara is still very tired. Putting Callie back to sleep in the middle of the night doesn't take long (so Sara tells me), but it still interrupts her sleep.

Learning English

List of words Callie is using:

1. no
2. peek-boo
3. thank you
4. there you go (when she hands something to someone)
5. Mom
6. Andrew
7. Anna
8. ba-bye
9. more
10. uh oh

(She calls Caty "Eee.")

She is so happy-go-lucky, and she's very comfortable out of our laps and arms. She's often exploring. Tonight at our senior pastor's house, she was all over the place, playing with anyone who was willing. It's like she's lived with us ever since she was born. The change over the last week has been incredible.

She slept through the night for the first time a couple nights ago. We were elated.

Callie and Routine

Callie is doing great! She loves being outside. She's starting to enjoy her baths instead of screaming. She runs and jumps, though both feet never actually leave the ground at the same time. She's learning the routine of the Scantlin home.

Routine. Sara's routine in particular has been significantly modified. Sara and I tend to be task-oriented as opposed to people-oriented. As long as Sara removes several things from her typical daily list and adds "be there for Callie whenever she cries or needs Mommy to hold her," she will still feel fulfilled as a task-oriented individual.

Bigfoot is alive and well! Let's talk numbers. My son Andrew:
Age: 13
Height: 6' 2"
Shoe size: 14 wide
No. of times he's told me he loves me since we returned from China: Countless

Took the kids to a Chinese restaurant Friday night. Anna and I enjoyed the sweet and sour chicken until I opened my fortune cookie and read, "That wasn't chicken."

We've enjoyed our Memorial Day weekend thus far. Sunday my parents and nephew came over, and then my brother and niece. Finally we decided to get pizza, my brother's other two kids, and cake. We weren't planning on it, but we ended up celebrating my niece Audrey's 9th birthday.

This afternoon we're planning on enjoying a cookout at Sara's brother's house.

Practicing English

Nights are still not perfect, but they're improving. Callie still wakes up often, but it's a little easier to get her back to sleep. In fact, I slept quite well last night--Callie never came to our bed! But then again, neither did Sara.

The night before last, all three of us were in our bed. Sara and I both woke around 4:30am because Callie was awake. But this time she wasn't crying. She was talking, real quiet. Neither of us moved, just listened. "Ba ba, Dad-dy. Cal-lie. Ma-ma, Mom-my. Cal-lie." Etc. Sara and I both got the impression she was rehearsing new words.

Sara has often touched herself and said "Mommy," then me and said "Daddy," then Callie and said "Callie," going back and forth repeatedly for some time, teaching Callie our names. I wish you could have heard Callie reciting her "lessons." It was very cute!

Sara said she did the same thing again early this morning, practicing words such as "Daddy," "Mommy," and "Andrew."

Other Callie news: She's still potty-trained, essentially getting Sara's attention in one way or another that she has to go. This is a good thing; Sara says she's horrible at potty-training.

Callie also spent some time outdoors yesterday, unsure of walking on grass but willing to try. She loves the outdoors. Later, she was out with Caty, Anna, and her cousin Aza watching Caty blow bubbles and Aza pop them.

Callie continues to adapt and transition. She's doing well. Nonetheless, we look forward to her sleeping through the night in her own bed without one of us in it. And we look forward to all of us being healthy; everyone except me is in some stage of a cold (though Callie's almost done with it).

Sleepless in Fort Wayne

Each day is better, and each night is better. That's not saying much; as far as the nights go, we only had up to go.

Monday night was horrible. Callie was essentially up until 5am, and crying . . . no, screaming, the whole time. At one point (3:00? 4:00?) we sat her on the potty, at which point she stopped her screaming and said, "Byow pee pee" (No pee pee). She then resumed her screaming. Sara and I had a good laugh for several minutes over that one (our only laugh of the night). Part of the struggle was she wouldn't settle for anything less than laying across Sara's chest. The next day Sara slept until after 12:00, and Callie until 2:30.

Tuesday night was much better, though she screamed for quite a while, though she was in bed with us, and though she woke up half a dozen times through the night screaming. At least we got more sleep.

Now tonight Sara just came downstairs at 11:00--without Callie! And get this: she's in her own bed . . . asleep!

Wednesday nights look like this: we go to Bible study/youth group/kids club at 7:00. Afterwards we go up to our senior pastor's house along with a few others for socializing around the kitchen table. We expected Callie to cling to Sara the whole time tonight. But she surprised us. She played in the nursery, and she wandered around the kitchen, mainly because of her interest in a do--, a do--, . . . it's hard to say, a dog.

Yes, we've spotted a flaw in our child. She likes dogs, at least this dog, the Ryans' dog, "Marley" some call it. She kept feeding "Marley" popcorn much to our senior pastor's chagrin. Then she followed "Marley" around to pet it. (Apparently in my family's pet debate, I'm getting further outnumbered.)

Callie made Caty's night tonight when Caty came to the nursery after kids club. Callie was sitting on Sara's lap, saw Caty, got down off Sara's lap, walked over to Caty, and held her hands up, which in the universal toddler language means, "Pick me up."

Home!

Thank you for your prayers! We are home, safe and sound. The killer flight was the flight from Hong Kong to Chicago--14 hours! And all the parents were nervous about how their kids would do, because no one wants to be a nuisance to the other passengers because they can't keep their kids from crying and squirming.

Callie did very well, because in answer to your prayers, the Lord kept her asleep for most of the trip. She slept the first 4 hours and then about the last 6 hours, and during the awake times, she did well.

All the kids did well, except for one, and it was a difficult experience for her parents, though they wore it well. (On top of that, the turbulence made the mom sick.)

Anna and I played lots of UNO on the trip to pass the time.

Long lay-over in Chicago, and it was all I could do to keep from falling asleep. Eventually the six families went their various ways, and we said good-bye to people we had come to love and lean on for two weeks. (The seventh family left Guangzhou before the rest of us did.)

Andrew and Caty, Sara's brother's family, my parents, and three of my brother's kids met us at the airport. Andrew and Caty were able to elicit smiles from their new sister. We collected our luggage--it was amazingly never displaced during any of our seven flights--and went home. Home! China was great, but it's great to be home. Andrew, Caty, and Jessica had decorated, and Caty and my mom had baked a cake.

We were up until midnight talking with the kids, and Callie seemed to enjoy exploring.

The next day, Sunday, was a difficult day for Callie, possibly because of her cold, and possibly because she's experiencing jet lag. We had many "Welcome back" greetings from our church family, slept four hours in the afternoon (and could've probably slept longer), and then went over to my parents in the evening to show them my 27 quality pictures of China and the 838 other ones.

The journey for Callie is at its end, and yet the journey for Callie has just begun. I don't know what that means; it just sounds really insightful and deep, like something appropriate to put in a blog. Perhaps a better ending is, Man, am I tired!

The Journey's Almost Over

Last blog from China. We enjoyed our last full day in China. Sara and Callie went shopping with other moms to a pearl place and other shops. Anna and I did some shopping here on Shamian Island (mainly Anna). I'm telling you, Shamian Island is a shopping heaven or hell, depending on your gender.

We ate lunch at a Thai restaurant (The Cow and Bridge), a place we enjoyed 6 years ago, but we steered clear of the ostrich kidneys and the BBQ pigs feet.

This afternoon we all trekked to the US Consulate where we swore an oath that all the info we supplied was accurate, thus insuring that once Callie sets foot on American soil, she will be an American citizen. The gravity of the moment was lost on her as she fussed about us not letting her down to walk around.

Anna stayed back at the hotel with her friend Taylor and Taylor's grandma. During the three hours we were gone, they watched Little Women, and when two people kissed at the end, they both went into the bathroom and gagged, saying, "It's bad enough when our parents do it."

As I type at 8:23pm Friday night (8:23am Friday morning in Fort Wayne), I am dumbfounded that God has led us to adopt now a second daughter from China. The adventures he takes us on.

Callie is right now being a toddler and reminding me of what we signed up for: she's into everything. There are not enough high places in the hotel room to put things out of her reach.

We are ready to come home, but tomorrow will be a very long day, literally. We need to be up at 5am, and then we're flying to Hong Kong, then from Hong Kong to Chicago (the killer 12+ hour flight), then from Chicago to Fort Wayne. Our day, due to time changes, will be around 36 hours long.

We again ask for your prayers and thank you for your prayers.

Callie Characteristics

God answers prayer! Three to four hours after I posted our lost blog entry, Sara was up with Callie, still feverish and miserable. Sara called our pediatrician friend in KY who assured Sara she was doing all the right stuff. Shortly after the call, and while Sara was still holding Callie, her fever broke! She woke up much better and playful. She had a mild fever again in the late morning, but that broke at lunch, and her cold is subdued. Thanks for the prayers, and keep praying, please.

Many of the electronic controls are on a console by the bed in our hotel, well within reach of Callie. So our “Do Not Disturb” sign is always on, and the radio is always on, too. Usually we’re listening to either contemporary Chinese music or to a Chinese call-in program.

Callie and I have developed at least 10 little games that I am asked to do over and over and over and over and over. I think I did “this little piggy” 20 times in a row tonight. No joke. I think part of it is her trying to learn our language, and I think the language issue is still a big thing with her.

When Callie is hurt, she doesn’t say, “Ow, ow.” Instead, she says, “Oh, oh” and places her hand on her ouchie spot. Once we rub it and kiss it, she’s usually good to go.

We learned from Alison, our Beijing/Guangzhou guide, that Callie is calling Anna “Sister," me “Daddy," and Sara “Auntie” in Chinese. Alison attempted to correct her. Analyze that one if you want.

It’s been interesting to Sara and me that Callie has bonded to both of us about equally as well, which is highly unusual. It has not turned out that way in any of the other families. In 3 of the families, the adopted bonded to Mom tightly. In 2 of them, they bonded to Dad, to the point where neither one of them wanted Mom at all and would cry when Dad would leave the hotel room. Both of those moms really struggled for the first few days until their daughters warmed up to them. And in one family, the girl bonded instantly to the 12-year-old sister. Side effect: the one bonded to is worn out after just 2 or 3 days. (Anna bonded instantly to Sara in ‘02.)

More bonding issues: Mixed results on adopted kids bonding with their new siblings. Callie is always concerned where "Je je" ("sister") is, but she never really wants Anna to hold her.

One of the traditions for adopting families in Guangzhou is “the red couch picture” wherein all the adopted kids of the group are dressed in traditional Chinese dress, placed together on a red couch, and their pictures are taken. That precious little tradition took place today. Only two of the kids were not cooperative, as predicted by their parents. (See the picture on the left.)

Anna bought herself a Chinese Barbie-like doll. We couldn’t find a name for her, though, in the box. I suggested Kow Lung, but she’s not going for it. Anna also made friends with a boy, Taylor, in our travel group who is slightly older, which is great for her. Nonetheless, I'm keeping my eye on that boy . . .

Chinese TV: Our days are usually busy, so we don’t watch much. However, we have taken in some professional sports: table tennis, badminton, and sumo wrestling. I still haven't figured out the philosophy behind, "Get as large as you can, and wear as little as possible."

We did a 2-hour river boat cruise on the Pearl River this evening. Guangzhou is beautiful at night along the river, all lit up with neon, and the weather was perfect.

Last night we went to a traditional Chinese restaurant. In the lobby were cages and tanks holding several menu items, most of which were alive: varieties of fish, turtles, shrimp, one variety of snake, sandworms (very large), water beetles, etc. Our actual meal was much tamer than that, however. Tonight for supper we had Papa John’s.

Three prayer requests:
1) Pray Callie continues to mend and the rest of us stay healthy.
2) All of us are concerned about how well our kids will handle the 12-hour flight home Saturday. Pray for all 7 families and their adopted daughters. (Callie’s showing signs of not wanting to be held all the time.)
3) Pray both our flights (to Chicago and to Fort Wayne) are not delayed or cancelled.

Sick; Guangzhou

We would appreciate your prayers for Callie. She started developing a cold on Monday, and her cold continued to strengthen today with a horribly runny nose, junky cough, and eye matter. Tonight she has developed a fever as well. We long to see her on the mend and feeling better.

Tuesday was a day of waiting. We waited around the hotel until 2:30pm when Isabel picked us up. We stopped and got Callie’s passport and then made the hour-long trek to Fuzhou’s airport. Having checked through with a couple hours to spare for our 7:20 flight, we took our time eating supper at the airport. Then our flight was delayed 100 minutes. Flight at 9, Guangzhou airport at 10:15, check in at our hotel around 11:45. To bed around 1.

No liquids are allowed to be carried onto China flights, so we had no medicine for Callie from 4 to midnight.

We are staying at the White Swan Hotel on Shamian Island in Guangzhou. Shamian Island is a beautiful place to be, albeit a bit of a tourist trap (the Gatlinburg of China), and the weather is gorgeous. Anna and I went swimming outside tonight at 8:00 amidst palm trees and with a full view of the Pearl River and the slick cruise boats navigating her waters. (Hopefully tomorrow night we'll be on one of those boats.)

Callie and the other adopted kids had a "body check" today at a nearby clinic (to satisfy the US Consulate, I think). Same place Anna had hers 6 years ago. We pointed out different places to Anna here in Guangzhou that we have pictures of from our trip to adopt her.

Our whole group is united once again from their various cities of adoption, and most of them have stories to tell about the earthquake. Two families were in their rooms on the 22nd floor. They grabbed their babies and flew down 22 flights of stairs in record time. One father thought on the way down that this could be the end: “If this thing’s going to fall, we’ll never make it out in time.” The one grandma in the group was on the 20th floor with her grandson and thought she was having vertigo. Another family was on the 5th floor of a restaurant when the chandelier threatened above them and a crack appeared in the wall. They made it out, and curiously enough, their waitress followed them out to collect for their drinks which they never even got a chance to sip. We are grateful for the safety of our travel families, but we mourn the enormous loss the Chinese have sustained.

Pray for Callie.

A Gazebo, a Pagoda, and Roast Duck

We did not feel the earthquake today. It's 10pm Monday here in China, and I didn't even know about the earthquake until a few minutes ago when I went online.

Callie is doing well. She loves to play and laugh and be outside, but there's also moments, few though they are, almost of borderline terror where she suddenly gets a scared look in her eyes and comes running for one of us, insisting we pick her up, and then clinging tightly to us lest we set her down.

She loves the telephone in our hotel room. We've disconnected one of them so she can play with it. Her idea of playing with it is having me talk on it while she presses the buttons. When I say "Bye," she looks up and says, "Bye," by which she means, "You pick that up and start talking on it again while I press the buttons." It's tremendously fun for one of us.

Though the purpose of our time in China is obvious, there are many side benefits. One of them is the fun Anna and I have shared. Like this afternoon. Sara put Callie down for a nap, and so instead of making Anna be quiet in the room, she and I went for one of our many walks. This time we walked to a large gazebo-like structure out in the middle of a pond, sat down and played several games of UNO. Surrounding us was the warm breezy air, the pond full of fish, and people frequenting a tea house across the way.

I know Anna enjoys this even though her mouth may say otherwise. I hugged her at one point this morning and said, "I sure am glad for all this Daddy-daughter time." She grinned and said, "I'm more interested in Anna-money time."

We visited a tea house today where we treated to four different kinds of tea, and then we were treated to the opportunity of buying some tea. I think the women enjoyed that.

We also visited the Xichang (?) buddhist temple. There were several buildings and statues on the premises (one hall had large statues of 500 of Buddha's disciples!), but very peaceful, and the nature was great: a large banyan tree, a large pond populated by turtles, open courtyards, breezy halls. Physically beautiful, but spiritually depraved. There were many, many, many worshippers there in various buildings (it didn’t seem crowded because of the size of the complex), and they were bowing before statues, praying, burning incense, touching relics, placing offerings.

Isabel was surprised because there’s usually not many people there. When she asked someone, she found out it was “the founder of the Buddhas birthday.” I don’t know what that means. Buddha’s birthday? I looked it up online but couldn't determine anything. A fifteen-story pagoda stood in one of the courtyards. As we exited, a lady with three turtles in a bowl tried to sell us one.

Isabel took us to a traditional Chinese restaurant where we lunched on mushroom and pork soup, roast duck, beef, broccoli, fried noodles (in which were mixed various foods, including squid), watermelon, and coke, no ice. We persuaded Isabel to eat with us and were delighted to learn more about our guide.

Fuzhou is beautiful; tomorrow will probably be our last sight of it.

Another Talker?

Over the last few days, I have reflected on what God has done. Never had I dreamed that I would ever set foot in China, let alone twice. Never I had ever given any thought to adopting--I assumed any and all children I had would be biological--and now God has given me two beautiful daughters by that very means, and in the process he has deepened my understanding of reinforced my gratitude for his adoption of me in Christ Jesus (Galatians 4).

As I write this Sunday evening, half way around the world our own church family at Northside Missionary is gathering in the sanctuary to join together in corporate worship. Those are our brothers and sisters and Christ. And yet here in China we have millions of brothers and sisters as well, practically all of whom we don't know yet, but we will one day.

How's Callie doing? She's doing great. She appears to be a happy-go-lucky kid, though she may have a bit of stubbornness, too. We had a great day with her today.

I previously described Callie's voice as husky and low. It's not super-low, and it's not really husky. It's clear; it's just not as high-pitched as other toddlers. And when she's comfortable, she says quite a few things. We've had our guide, Isabel, listen to her a few times to see what she's saying. Isabel indicates it's mostly toddler talk, not real words. Could've fooled us, because it's nonetheless Chinese toddler talk.

She always calls my hat a "maugy" (hard "g"). Tonight, whenever I took it off, she would start saying, "maugy, maugy," retrieve it, bring it to me, then grin real big when I put it on, thus hiding her brown eyes and displaying two rows of tiny white teeth.

Isabel told us that Callie talks more than any other adopted kid she works with (at that age, I assume). That's what I was hoping for.

We went to a national forest in Fuzhou this morning. It was beautiful--bamboo plants, a bird sanctuary, a 1000-year-old banyan tree (enormous), palm trees, mountains and water in the background. After lunch, Sara, not feeling well, slept most of the afternoon. So the girls and I took a walk to a new park, and we had a great time.

Despite her mild symptoms, Sara enjoyed her Mother's Day. I close by wishing my own mother a Happy Mother's Day. Thanks for taking care of Andrew and Caty while we're gone.

Enjoying Callie, Fuzhou

We want to thank everyone who has posted comments or emailed us. Your messages have been an encouragement to us. We have a lot of free time, so we're online every day.

Our normal routine in Fuzhou is: out and about with our guide Isabel in the morning; on our own from lunch on.

We had a great day with Callie today. She napped some this morning, so she was awake in our hotel room all afternoon, and she played and played and played. She has finally taken some interest in Anna, much to Anna's delight--Anna's been patient--and the two played together quite a bit. Callie likes to have fun, it seems, and enjoys the games Sara and I play with her to get her to laugh. For instance, Sara slowly goes after her and then tickles her. She does this repeatedly, to the point where Callie is squealing with laughter before Sara even gets near her.

This evening I did "This Little Piggie" with her toes for the first time. She liked it so much, each time I finished she grabbed my hand and placed it on her foot to do it again.

One of her clearest phrases is pronounced, "byow byow," which means "no no." Sometimes when we take her to sit on the potty, her face drops, and she starts moaning "byow byow, byow byow, byow byow." She cries while she sits on the potty, but instantly stops and stares into the toilet when it's time to flush.

This morning Isabel took us to the museum about the city of Fuzhou (pronounced "fooGOH" [soft, soft "g", as the "j" in bonjour]). The city is 2200 years old. Of particular interest were two mummies, unbound, lying in clear containers of formaldehyde (?).

Fuzhou is the capital of Fujian province. The province's pop. is 13 million, 6 million of which live in Fuzhou. The weather is somewhat tropical. We've experienced high 70s and low 80s, and a couple days have been pretty muggy. We've had a good deal of precipitation, too, though rarely heavy.

From the museum we went to a mall, at least four layers of shops. Now it was my face that dropped; Jim's, too. But we managed to get out in under an hour. We then went searching for an instrument store for Jim. Found one where he purchased a traditional Chinese instrument, a horn of some sort, for 70 RMB ($10).

This evening, our wives felt adventuresome and hungry, so with the hotel's help, we hailed taxis, went to KFC set in the bustling nightlife of downtown Fuzhou, ate as we were conspicuously the center of attention, and took taxis back to the hotel. (My chicken sandwich was more than chicken, as cooked into the meat were what appeared to be soybeans, corn, and carrots. It tasted good.)

We were planning on going downtown to see the Olympic torch run through here tomorrow, but Isabel doesn't think it's a good idea. Most of the downtown streets will be closed (so we'd have to walk), and crowds of over half a million are expected.

One of the side effects of toddler adoption is back pain. Jim has a black belt in Shaolin, and I have a few rather large black belts myself; nonetheless, due to clinging toddlers, we have both discovered underdeveloped back muscles.

We've two and a half days left in Fuzhou . . .

Sunshine after the Storm

Thank you for your prayers. The evening was wonderful!

After naps, we decided to go for a walk to the nearby park with the other family adopting with us here in Fuzhou, Jim and Shelly Peters (and daughter Caity). Sara carried Callie much of the time, and during that time, Callie started calling things out in Chinese. Sara knew the word for "tree," and asked Callie about it, and there was a language connection! Further, Callie now recognizes me as "Daddy," and I understand her word for "hat." She also almost said "gentle" in response to a game Sara plays with her.

When we got back to the hotel room, there was crying because we were back in our room, but then Sara got out some books and started reading to her, and Callie got down off her lap--she's clung to us the last day and a half--and started drawing with Anna, and then kicking the ball, and then playing with the other toys. Then she started laughing and smiling, and we had a wonderful play time for over an hour. That smile of hers, and her husky little voice, and the squeal of laughter--it melts our hearts. God is so good.

I love Callie's eyes. I fell in love with Anna's eyes because they were so big. And I love Callie's eyes because they're so hidden. When she laughs or cries, we wonder if she can actually see anything. She has such a beautiful face, and her expressions powerfully move our hearts, either with pathos or delight.

This morning we went to the Fuzhou orphanage which oversaw Callie and Caity's care and their placement in foster care. We purchased a cake, and about 20 kids with mild special needs (ages 7-14?) came and greeted us, shared the cake with us, and sang with us. Beautiful kids; great enthusiasm; well-mannered; and not likely to be adopted because of their age. Then we went upstairs and toured the nursery of babies with special needs. Some sleeping, some staring, some smiling. One little girl stood up and waved to us with a big smile on her face.

One women in the nursery said that Anna looked like Sara, which brought a laugh to everyone, because we all know she looks like me!

Lunch at a very large McDonald's today. It's kind of funny how Chinese food reminds me of home.

Today is our daughter Caty's 11th birthday. It's hard to be away from her on this special day. But she has been very understanding. Ironically, my parents are taking her to eat Chinese food for her birthday.

Saw more dogs today, none of them very cute.